May 11, 2013

I'm a Mom

I was a Mom 2 years before I birthed my 1st born son Ethan.
You see, I got pregnant and carried the baby until just before the 10th week. 
Then, life took a u-turn and I miscarried. 
I remember sitting in church that 1st Mother's Day after I lost my baby, 
praying that I would make it through the service without completely losing it. 
I got close to making it but the children's ministry had the kids bring in roses to hand to all the Mothers in the sanctuary. 
Tears welled up in my eyes and I was fighting hard to hold them back. 
My sweet friend Terri reached over to me, 
handed me one of her roses, 
and she said to me "you are a Mother too".
The tears flowed, freely.
I felt in that moment greatly loved and embraced by the Lord,
understood and cared for by my friend Terri,
and also greatly healed and set free.
I felt an acknowledgement finally that I too was a Mother.
I did have a baby, now in heaven, in the very presence of the Lord, and I was his/her Mom.
I was a Mom.

Then, I had another miscarriage.

I learned to wait and trust in the Lord's best.

A year later I birthed Ethan.
42 weeks gestation, 8lb 3oz, perfect in every way.
My sweet, lovely 1st born son was here.
Ethan means strong & constant in Hebrew. 
He is his name, fully.
I love how his life has brought so much life to mine and my husbands' lives!

2 years later I got to meet my precious son Owen.
Owen is such a sweet warrior poet.
He is passionate, tender, emotional, deep-voiced, and imaginative.
I love being his Mommy.
And just look at how alert he was for being just a few hours old!

I had another miscarriage, which not many people knew about. 
Owen was a few months old and it all happened so fast.
Yet another sweet baby who gets to see the Lord before I do :)
I can't wait to meet him/her.

And then two years after Owen I had sweet Ava.
Ava was a surprise and yet she was such a tremendous blessing.
Her name means life, and life is what she brings to the family!
She is my only natural birth and I got to have her at home - it was perfect!
I am so thankful to be her Mommy.
And her brothers have LOVED her right from the start (Ava was only a day old here).

Children are a gift and Motherhood an amazing journey of love and self sacrifice.
Kiss those children of yours today Momma!
God is Good, all the time.
Now, go hug a Mom and tell her how blessed she is by the Lord.

1 comment:

  1. What a beautiful post. How brave of you to share your journey and what being a mom means to you. Happy mother's day my sweet friend.


Thanks for the comment!! :)